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Step Parenting

Imagine an individual who had been praying to the gods for the perfect partner. Years have passed and so was her youth, yet no man was any close to her ideal spouse. Then it seemed that the heavens smiled at her, she found her soul mate. The puzzle that was her life has now been completed. The romance led to the altar, and from the altar they proceeded to live under a single roof.

Teenage kids from a previous marriage

Picture perfect, isn’t it? Well, not quite. Let us add a little spice to the mixture. How about teens, yes teens -teens from the husband’s first marriage. And their attitude towards her is nothing but indifference. Given this scenario, step parenting appears to be an obstacle that only a few can hurdle.

Challenges of committing to somebody who has already has kids.

Committing to someone who already has kids will certainly post challenges. You will not only devote your life to your new spouse but to his children as well. The statement may sound straight-forward and trouble free but the fact is, this is anything but straight-forward and trouble free. Adjustments will be made, lines will be drawn, and territorial places will be marked.

The rebellion phase

The accepting attitude of a child during the dating period will eventually turn into coldness, even rebellion. Once the knot has been tied, the walls of separation tend to grow thicker and higher. This rebellion phase will not last forever. But then again, this stage will not end in the near future either. Acceptance and consideration is part and parcel of step parenting. Your authority will be challenged and your place in the family will be questioned, this may be physically and emotionally draining, but as an adult it is only appropriate that you stand your ground, be understanding, and be calm.

What about Discipline?

Discipline will be an issue. With this said, a dictator will not earn any respect in the newly formed household. Effective step parenting demands that one stride the fine line when it comes to discipline. It is advisable that the parents discuss the issue in private and let the biological parent mete out the punishments, if such is necessary.

Many different qualities needed to be a step parent

There is more to being a step-parent than getting along and striving to live with step children. One should be unselfish enough to love them knowing that you are not their real parent. It is painful to say that no matter the amount of love and support you have given, they will always seek the love of their biological parent for there exist a crevasse that can only be filled by that biological connection. One should be mature and act appropriately with regard this kind of requirements.

With open communication and mutual respect and understanding between and among family members, biological or otherwise, step parenting will not be as burdensome as expected.



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